All right. This is an outrage.
I tolerated the trashing of Transformers being turned into a box-office bomb. I held my tongue when they sloppily digified Scooby-Doo and sank Inspector Gadget in the Hollywood sewer. But I refuse, REFUSE to stand idly by and watch my beloved childhood idol be Barbie-fied before my very eyes. It is sacrilege and it will not be tolerated.
Take a look at the "new" Strawberry. I mean, what is the DEAL with that garish god-awful early-90's hot pink? I don't know about you, but where I come from, strawberries are red, not radioactive magenta (I believe that is an actual Crayola™ color now). The original Strawberry was all wholesome with her disproportional oversize-head-to-sticklike-body ratio and simple red dress with the white smock. New Strawberry looks like a trollop.
It just ain't right. I shan't support this sort of manipulation of my childhood figureheads. The line is officially drawn. If my #2 happens to be female and if it ever so happens she would want one of these new tramp line of Strawberry Shortcakes, she's just going to have a little lesson about living with disappointment.
1 day ago