Tuesday, May 12, 2009

More About Things I Hate

About a block away from my office is a Thai place that is called Somethingorother Restobar. Get it? It's a restaurant AND a bar.

I didn't get it at first either. I thought it was someone's name. Then I got it and it made me angry. I believe that to be the correct reaction.

Now, they're finishing up a Courtyard Marriott across the street from the office. There's a bar on the first floor. The glass shelves and tap levers taunt me as I go in and out. And next to it is a restaurant. Only it's not called a restaurant. It's called a "Dinerant". It makes me want to hit things. I'll tell you why...both of those titles are the definition of indecision to me. Indecision is paramount to puppy violence in my book.

Shut up, it's my book.

A diner is a diner and a restaurant is a restaurant and neither the twin shall meet. Or however the saying goes. I don't get to be a shemale. I have to choose. Or, rather...I don't get to choose. Bad example. But you see where I'm going.

Is this a trend anywhere else? Or is Portland the only city filled with idiots who think they're edgy but really are just idiots? I need to know so I can figure out where to move.

22 keep(s) me blogging:

Orhan Kahn said...

What the shit; you're a shemale now? Since when. Oh, my. I've got calls to make.

Gorilla Bananas said...

I assume they are trying to make people curious by using a different name for the same thing. You may be annoyed, but I can sense you're curious. However shemales really are different, Missy, have a look at the pictures.

Rachel said...

O.
M.
G.

I'm in complete agreement with you: those are HORRIBLE ideas.

As far as I know no such abominations exist here. Closest we get is "somethingorother bar and grill"

The AND is key, people! Nothing wrong with AND. Or the ampersand! Use either. Save English!

erin said...

I've never seen either of those used around here...
I wonder if it's a west thing. Are you in the west?

Seems like things out there somewhere are all freaking wonky.

Piloting The Ship Of Fools said...

'Dinerant' would drive me wild too, but not because it's indecisive -- (which I think I am) -- but because it's poncy. Whoever thought up 'dinerant' probably figured that it would sound cleaner and posher than a plain old diner. In a 'dinerant' you can probably get chile con carne with coriander and jalapeno. The fried fish probably comes with a lemon zest garnish. And that is just wrong.

Mary Witzl said...

I wrote the above comment! The person who borrows my laptop left his own £"^$&ing user name on.

Robert the Skeptic said...

This is yet another example of the scourge of Marketing. Marketing influences ruin everything, they have made TV not worth watching, they are trying to ruin the internet and they are the incessant purveyors of crap we don't need. I'll bet some ad campaign idiot got a big pat on the back and a huge bonus for coming up with "Dinerant".

I would eat there then tell someone on their way out that the food was so bad, you understand why they weren't allowed to call the place a Restaurant.

d said...

no pat on the back, but that bonus sure did come in handy :-)

actually, i wouldn't think of taking credit for dinerant. that's clearly the work of a special kind of idiot. but we do have restobars around here so probably not safe to come to canada. plus there's the cold. and hoards of witless hockey fans. and pine trees. and polar bears...

Stinkypaw said...

Never heard of "dinerant" before, not a good name combo... It looks just as bad as that sign, urgh!

Wow, that was awkward said...

You must be from Pennsyltucky.

Wow, that was awkward said...

You must be from Pennsyltucky.

AxAtlas said...

In the midwest and southern parts of this USA, there's a restaurant or diner called Steak n' Shake. In their commercials they're always saying they are a RESTaurant, where you are seated and they serve you as opposed to a "WORKaurant" where you go up to a register and order and get your food. Annoyed?
Whoa did I just comment on your blog? Amazing! Feels like it's been fereverz.

The Future said...

Sounds to me like a place where they need a residential exterminator or paleontologist (Mike insisted on that one but I like mine better).

Jill said...

These people are trying to make up new words. You can't just go around making up new words without proper approval. Someone should report them to the Miriam-Webster Dictionary people immediately.

Rachel Noy said...

Oh bloody hell, why don't they just make their minds up, rather than having some weaksauce shit in the middle.

You don't get to be a she-male? You can be anything you want to be if you put your mind to it, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

The Future said...

Whatever you think, the signage accomplished what was intended, it got you all wondering. From G'Ma Crys.

Old Knudsen said...

What is a stripclub? is it a strip mall or a club for baby seals? I don't get it.

Missy May said...

Well you can be a she-male if you really want...though I think it's a rather invasive process and you seem to have a lot going right now. And as far as relocation, avoid CA too. Stupidity crosses borders, see my post on lift kits for details.

Susie Q said...

I blame "sporks"! The spoon/fork of yore. Of course, skorts (half skirt half shorts) coulda been the culprit. It's an attempt to be clever, and attempting clever never works.

theWaif said...

There's no escaping evil word melanges...hell, even "blog" is one. If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em. Amirite?

And I do believe the term you seek is "neither the twain," not "twin." I could be wrong, but it's highly improbable.

kara said...

deep breath...here we go:

or - no, since i didn't get to choose, i didn't choose to stay just female but am anyway. but you've prolly already made those calls by now, huh.

goranas - i'm about to eat pizza, i don't want to ruin it.

rachel - i'm glad you're on my side. i need more than just my verizon network.

erin - i am in the west...where the sun sets and all that junk. not sure if that's connected, though.

mary - when in actuality it makes it seem like a place to eat that's ok with having ants. or something.

dad - since i work in marketing i'm not allowed to agree with you AT ALL (wink, wink)

d - you're working pretty hard on that polar bear infestation, though, aren't you?

stinkypaw - i know! and that's not even the one across from me, it didn't have a sign yet when i posted this. that's from the internet so we know there's one somewhere ELSE!!

wow - hush it, midwest!

ax - see, i'd totally dig a Steak 'n Shake. totally. that's just gold.

future - and what kinds of foods would they serve?

jill - for shizzity!

rachel - you make me believe i can fly! and have extra parts!

g.ma crys - yes, it worked! damnit, you're right!

knudsen - the latter. for kids.

may - you're telling me! half this town is stupidity from your CA side of the border. build the wall! (but i'll check out the post)

sue - you are the cleverist. and so is the inventor of the spork.

waif - it was a SPELLING error! everyone else could overlook it, why couldn't you? damnit, sister!

i've earned my pizza. neary out.

Twinkie said...

oh deer sweet lard. That's just stooped!

No but really. That's just UGH!