Monday, May 07, 2007

In Order Of Importance

Important things happening currently in my life/world:

1. Paris Hilton is going to jail. With liberty and justice for all.

2. I rode my scooter in flip-flops. And still managed to look bad-ass.

3. The Great Co-habitation Debate is over. We found a place that is too good to be true. And by that I mean it has a dishwasher. It's all up to fate now.

4. I have Napoleon Dynamite and The Apprentice MAD LIBS sitting on my desk at work. Each was purchased and bestowed upon me by a different co-worker who just thought I might like them. Sometimes people are darling.

5. It's 75 degrees today and I rode my bike to work in a sundress. It's green. The same pea green as my eyes. That's p-e-a, people.

6. My lucky desk bamboo is still holdin
g on to life. And there's totally some photosynthesis happening.

7. My Classic Rock-Only-Lovin' boyfriend has admitted to me that he is interesting in hearing more Radiohead. How convenient that I have all their albums. That's what I call progress.


8. That exhibition with the skinless human bodies in action poses is coming to Portland. I'm gonna visit it while eating a SPAM sandwich. Representing all that skin that cannibals could've had. Americans are just so wasteful.

9. Barak is kicking ass in the polls. I haven't decided if I'll vote for him just yet...but I like his smile. No essence of skeez.


10. Somewhere...deep in the bowels of California...Paris Hilton is getting ready to go to jail.


18 keep(s) me blogging:

apterix55 said...

1. The "celebutant" will NEVER see the inside of a cell.
2. Bad idea, very bad idea!
3. Consult with us about how to merge your TupperWare.
4. Maybe they are trying to get you not to talk?
5. I believe they are Hazel.. like, from MY side of the chromosome set.
6. Have you ever TRIED to kill bamboo.. it's not possible.
7. We've been over this about "Classic" rock, ahem!
8. Now if the Holocost museum would just tour.
9. The Republicans are simply biding their time to use the "my middle name is Hussaine" card sometime in '08.
10. Somewhere.. high in a law firm overlooking Burbank, a team of attorneys are working to prevent just that.

Laura said...

I do believe you mean somewhere in the "bowels" of California as opposed to "bowls", unless by "bowls" you mean "toilet bowls" in which case you are exactly correct.

That lucky bamboo better still be alive. It was MY lucky bamboo once. Though if it can survive my cat, it can survive anything.

Barack kept calling me so I finally gave in and answered the phone yesterday. I wasn't able to give him the money he asked for, nevertheless he did seem very nice on the phone. I guess it might not have actually been him, but it sounded like it could have been so I'm going to go ahead and believe that it was. And at least now I've stopped getting called by his unavailable number ten times a day.

The ice cream truck just drove by. I can still hear "Camptown Races" fading into the distance. Doo dah...doo dah.... I love summer.

Susie Q said...

Camptown races, ohhh the joys of childhood.
You know I once gave our ice cream truck dude a play-money coin. I was, like 6 years old, (yes, I WAS once a child, just cause I'm nearing "honored citizen" at Sharis...)and he TOOK it. What a "swell" guy. (Yeah, and I speak "Geizer" too.)

The Future said...

Well, I have nothing to say about any of that because I already made my Paris Hilton point. I guess the point is I'm way ahead of you!

Sarah said...

Hey, if Martha went to jail, so can Paris. But I highly doubt it. Wouldn't she miss her ratdog, "Tinkerbell" too much? Damn it, I know her dog's name. I'm ashamed.

Kav said...

You rode your scooter in flip-flops and still managed to look badass? Are you sure?

Excellent news on the Radiohead situation. Break him in gently with the old stuff, it will be closest to what he knows.

Macoosh said...

i say these are all things to celebrate. :)

and a dishwasher would so decide for me as well. that and in-home laundry facilities. i think i'd prefer that over the dishwasher. although, if the place has in-home laundry facilities, it most likely will have a dishwasher too, because, well, c'mon.

Kara said...

apterix - they're hazel sometimes...but mostly they just resemble the color of puke.

laura - i have two words for you...and they are...shut up.
(but thank you for the kick ass picture of Paris)

sue - that ice cream man probably lost his job over that. the fake money, i mean.

future - you're WAY ahead of me...cause you're the future. yeah, you walked right into that one.

sarah - not only do i know you know her dog's name...but i know you know what kind of dog it is.

kav - you'd be surprised how bad-ass my navy blue flip-flops are. you look straigh at them and they burn a hole through your soul. no fooling.

macoosh - i'm leaving free wash/dry for coin-op because i know i'll use the dishwasher more. i wash clothes every three weeks. that's how much underwear i have.

Emily said...

I'm not sure if I'm proud of embarassed - but Paris is going to jail? Why? When did this happen??? I hate that I'm curious....

Jill said...

We saw the "skinless human bodies in action" exhibit in Houston. They had plexi-glass cases full of diseased body parts too.

I don't think they allowed food or drink in the exhibit though, so you may have to rethink the spam sandwich strategy. Maybe go out for McNuggets afterwards or something....

Jen said...

Paris' new boobs will come in handy in prison, as her her new cellie will use them as cushiony pillowettes when her nasty jail issue bed pillow gets too many dustmites. She'll be gellin'...

That no skin thing is going to be awesome! And diseased body parts too? What is this, Christmas?

Oh Barack... I just read that old Hillary *the senator formerly know as Rodham* Clinton was ahead by at least 15 points. Say it ain't so...

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Paris is in the bowels of California. She's in the appendix where she's been causing a nasty infection for a while. The professionals thought it was time to remove her as she was making us all sick to the point of pain and pyook.

I just know you looked bad-ass all be-flip-flopped on your scooter, sistah!!

Anonymous said...

"Hey you take that off any sweet jumps lately"
Hey, maybe Nicole can get picked up on Narcotics again and it can become an episode of The Simple Life?

My Little Pony

Orhan Kahn said...

I rode my scooter in flip-flops. And still managed to look bad-ass.

I lol'd.

Kara said...

emily - don't hate that you're curious. embrace that you're curious. ...hate it when you become knowledgable.

jill - well, i've purchased a big purse (that $5 one from way back) with the express purpose of sneaking food and booze into things. been successful so far, so i don't know why i'd stop being successful now. and spam sandwiches are much less of a giveaway than hot, steamy Wendy's value meals.

jen - i enjoy saying the word "rodham"...you should too!

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Paris looks like she's asexually reproducing out a whole new ditz under her skirts there. Locking her up will do no good - she's meiotically budding pointless people everywhere! You didn't really think that was Lionel Ritchie's daughter did you? No! Nicole came from Paris's left 6th rib.

Sweet Jesus save us all!!

d said...

hey! look who's here.

Kara said...

sam - Oregon was born without an appendix. We're a Darwinistic miracle.

Pony - Life ain't so simple for THIS Hilton no mo'. That was prison-speak.

sam - you've just outlined my WORST nightmare.

d - hey!