Friday, June 01, 2007

I Just Bought Star Wars Stamps

I know. The United States Postal Service can sink no lower. My options were that or the "Forever Stamp" which has a stupid bell on it. You see I had no choice.

In other news...I'm told by a friend who has the same medical insurance as me that Oregon has just passed a law requiring insurance companies to cover birth control. As she put it, "Oregon is bravely stepping into the 1950s".

That's right...our insurance doesn't/didn't cover birth control. And if you don't think that's a big deal, let me tell you...that shit gets expensive. Especially if you can only use one specific kind because all other kinds give you side effects that mirror ingesting large quantities of Olean. Ok, not like those...but bad, believe you me.

Now maybe you understand the having to deal with the color change in panic levels in any given month. Or maybe not. I don't care.
Still, I always maintained that those of us who don't want children (or who, like me, are starting to lean towards not wanting them) are doing this country a favor by not procreating. Not adding to the population that needs to be fed, housed, clothed and entertained for the next 70-0dd years. We're keeping pools cleaner, restaurants quieter, cars smaller, happy hours fuller and taxes lower...we should be celebrated...or at least supported. But no...oh no...we're freaks who have to pay for our birth control out of pocket. Outrageous!

Speaking of not having insurance...I went to the dentist yesterday. Remember that chipped tooth I told you about? Turns out it couldn't just be filed down...of course not...it had to be drilled, filled, molded into a nubbin and crowned. Now, I've never had a cavity in my LIFE. This about sucked the life out of me. I have to go back for two more fillings and a permanent crown. But I may run. I know they'll catch up with me sometime...but I'll be the one to decide where...and when...and how my teeth are accosted by these merciless dentists of doom.

I left there with my face half frozen and had to go to work. It stayed numb for hours. Every smile was a sneer. I drooled without even knowing it. Lunch consisted of me tossing one piece of penne in at a time...and then gumming it til I could swallow. Did I mention I'd also had food poisoning the night before? Yeah. Chicken apple Gouda sausage. Never again.

Wow...that went from informing to whining within only a few paragraphs! I'm amazing.

Happy Friday, my little sloths!


13 keep(s) me blogging:

Gorilla Bananas said...

You have to smell different when you're ovulating. The human male will figure it out if you let him sniff down below. Well it works with female gorillas anyway.

Anonymous said...

Chicken apple Gouda sausage & bacon maple bars EEEWWWW. You Portland people sure do eat funny stuff. :)

Macoosh said...

i've never had a cavity either and I have an odd feeling when I get back to america the dentist will find one. I'm not so thrilled about this...not so thrilled at all.

I'm sorry you have to go through this...but I'm glad you're getting it done so it'll eventually be, well, done.

this was a boring comment. I've brought shame upon your funny blog.

oh, and I would totally buy star wars stamps.

Susie Q said...

A. Nothing wrong with Star Wars Stamps, nothing at all. But you know I'm old cause I still salivate a bit when I stamp a letter, so dammed used to licking them, it's ingrained in the brain.
B. Everything wrong with insurance not covering the pill, (or whatever method used). Geez, they cover the little blue pill, for the gents, but not the pill for the gals, screams of sexism, or some kind of "ism" anywho.

Anonymous said...

In honor of you I'm going to stop shaving my legs and under arms!! We are women hear us roar!! (for the pill for a small copay)

Unknown said...

Star Wars stamps suck. Where are the Harry Potter stamps? Seriously.

The B.C. thing is total B.S. I've never understood the reasoning behind it. I'm gonna cost the insurance company a whole lot more money by getting prego than I would if they'd just covered the expense of birth control in the first place. (Beckett was planned though, just to clarify.)

I like the word nubbin.

The Future said...

Maybe they could sell stamps with a picture of your nubbin teeth on them, they could be called "Crownless". Somehow, that makes me sad. It must be Friday night.

kara said...

look at me! i'm commenting on a saturday! yes i have things to do, shut up.

goranas - gross. that's really all i can think of to say to you. perhaps i'll come up with something better later, but it's saturday and it's hot.

pony - yeeeeuuuup!

macoosh - twas not boring a'tall. my job is boring. golf is boring. term papers are boring. operating manuals are boring. wheel of fortune is boring. taxes are boring. i could go on.

sue - they cover viagra???? you're kidding me! these people need to be crushed in one of those pilgrimage stampedes. then we'll see if their desire to over-populate the world still burns bright within.

pony - ok...i'll stop shaving my legs, but i can't not shave under my arms...i can't even not do it for 2 days. i heart double negatives.

waif - you should write a letter to the postal lords...and NOT put a stamp on it.

future - how dare you mock my nubbin! for shame!

thethinker said...

Chicken apple gouda what? Such a strange name...

Me said...

I don't think the post office really expects people to you the mail for very longer they're just printing whatever stamps they can. Just like the idiots who altered 40 thousand US quaters to have the 'Silver Surfer' on them to promote the new Fantastic Four movie.. which is illegal.

Wonder how much you'd be spending on birth control if you were a sex addict?

I haven't been to the dentist in years. And I mean YEARS.

Jansky T said...

Yay Star Wars stamp! May the force be with you, Kara.

Sarah said...

Chicken Apple Gouda Sausage! From Costco, right? They kick butt.
Insurance is a scam anyway. That is why I choose not to have it. This baby will be born all hippie like, in my bedroom.
Cavities suck...I hadn't had one in like 10 years and then BAM! out of nowhere, I had 13. My mouth was numb for a good week. I chewed a hole in the side of my cheek because I couldn't feel it. That really sucked.

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Why will the next 70 years be odd?