Monday, November 30, 2009

This Week's Stalkerish Shoutout Goes To...

...my beetches up in Wapakoneta, Ohio! That's right...stalkerish shoutouts are BACK!

How timely of me - in this Thanksgiving season - to choose a shout out to a reader in a town most likely named after the Native Americans that were driven out of it. But I'm not here to judge, since I had to copy and paste the city's name as I couldn't even sound it out well enough to spell it.

I've never been to Ohio, but am of the opinion that it is a kind of Promiseland. This is solely based on the fact that Dave Chappelle lives there. If he had a cult, I'd join it. But then I'd try to convince him to move its location to a coastal state because I always need to be able to escape by sea if necessary.

So reader in Wapakoneta - I'll leave it to you to start the foundation of the compound. It will probably need a fence and some huts. You can model it on an Amish community, though I think we should have cars. I enjoy them.

Until the next time (I remember that Google Analytics exists) you lucky bastardos...just keep reading from an actual location and you'll get shoutouted next!

In other news...is it weird that I think this is great? So strangely cuddly.

And there are more.

14 keep(s) me blogging:

Robert the Skeptic said...

I wonder if people ever get confused and end up in Iowa instead of Ohio? Wonder how many people living in either of those states can find their state on a map? I guess we need all those "flyover" states to keep the time zones separated.

... and while I'm wondering...I wonder what a skeltial rendering of Mr. Zip would look like?

Gorilla Bananas said...

What? You've linked to the same post you're linking from. Have you any idea how disappointing that is? Dave Chappelle was great in the 'Black Bush' sketch, which was removed from You Tube for copyright reasons. The homunculus-skeleton is devilish.

Brendan said...

Both sides of my family chose Kentucky over Ohio. Promised land it ain't.

Gorilla Bananas said...

Are you related to Colonel Sanders, Brendan?

Wow, that was awkward said...

Linking to the exact same place is like pleasuring yourself. I don't think you should include all your stalkers on such a private matter.

I do like those skeletons! The Snoopy one made me laugh.

kara said...

dad - i wonder if they were called "wagon over" states before there were planes.

goranas - it's a link to the "stalkerish" tag so it's got all the Shoutouts...including the most recent. it's all about scrolling.

b - maybe they got tired of traveling.

wow - jesus man...SCROLL. (and see above answer to goranas)

Stinkypaw said...

Those skeletons are too much!

Mary Witzl said...

I've been to Ohio and it's actually beautiful! But I thought Kentucky was beautiful too. I suspect I'm easy to please after growing up in the desert.

Love the Hello Kitty skeleton!

erin said...

Ohio is a scary, strange place.

We stopped at some small weird black hole of a town on the way home from seeing ben folds in columbus and it was like we walked into a dumb cliche movie about hicks/white trash/rednecks/ugly people/disfigured people/trannies. I was honestly confused and more than a little frightened. I am still to this day haunted by the things we saw there in Eastern OH....still to this very day.

The Future said...

I still refuse to buy you Hello Kitty skeletal jewelry even if it is Christmas.

rachelslessonslearned said...

I drove through Ohio once. The people there area all good drivers. Courteous and smartish.

But Ohio is still a Plains state. That means mind-numbingly dull.

Orhan Kahn said...

Oh my LOL!

That is MY American girl stalking you from Ohio. She is currently in Wapak. Killing time for the next 40-odd days until she is stalking you from Sydney, Australia.

What, what!

Chandi said...

Oh hey, that's me! I'm the stalker in Wapakoneta (and that could be a really kickass rapper name).

Ohio is beautiful if you like corn and white people.

Wapakoneta comes from the Indian Chief "Wapa" and his wife "Koneta". Before we skinned them alive and stole their babies.

Favorite. Shoutout. Ever.

Chandi said...

P.S.

Wah-pah-koe-netta

Or just Wapak for short. Come visit sometime! :)