Monday, November 05, 2007

I Have Too Much Perfume On And I'm Choking Myself

Is that too long of a title? Well it's TRUE. And truth is what we're all about here at Condi's Hair.

Posting is becoming a hassle. I've got all my best ideas during the work day (what can I say, I'm inspired by monotony) and lately there's too much work to do, so i can't write. Then you all have to settle for two paragraphs of word blarf written on my lunch hour ("hour"...funny) that isn't even funny. or whatever I happen to churn out at night in between trying to bake a casserole and watching the latest episode of Tell Me You Love Me (HBO, bitches). It's not quality work and I'm sick of it.

Wait. When did it become all about you? Since when do I have to please YOU? Ungrateful! I work so hard!

Anyway...I was away from my computer ALL weekend. Yes! I went to the beach. I saw sky. And food. And I went on a 4 mile moderate/difficult (labeled) hike. And I didn't even DIE of exposure. I know.

I also took pictures of a lighthouse. No, I don't know why. It just felt like the right thing to do at the time.

Normally by now Oregon is in full "sucketh" mode. Towards the end of September, the rain begins and then doesn't end until July of the following year. Yes, things are green. It's not worth it.

This year, it's been eerily beautiful. Every day has been near 60 (fahrenheit)...the sun has been shining. It didn't rain on Halloween. I don't know if it's global warming or some kind of gypsy hoodoo...but it gives me the creeps. In a good way.

Look at that. I've just reduced this blog to chitchat about the weather. Oh well...no refunds!






Tomorrow I'll do another advice column. I like doing them. They make me feel useful...like bathroom cleaner. The kind that clears the scum from your shower tiles.




18 keep(s) me blogging:

Mary Witzl said...

Great lighthouse shots -- really. What I especially like about these pictures is that there isn't some twee person in them waving cheerily to the photographer. That ruins most pictures like this, in my opinion, since you're after something that is stark and sober, not bright and obnoxiously happy-holiday.

And do you REALLY know a bathroom cleaner that clears the scum from your shower tiles? We must have killer scum: nothing shifts ours.

Macoosh said...

it's true. i ALWAYS feel scum free after visiting condi's hair.

Sarah said...

hehe. erected.

Rachel said...

I've got the same problem, blog wise...plenty of ideas, but too busy to write. It sucks!

I think my bosses gave me this new job because they knew it would keep me busier and I wouldn't be able to use company time to goof around on the blogosphere. Bastards.

Kevin said...

Your title. I can't smell a lot of things. I can't smell steak cooking, or garlic, or flowers. I can't smell if something is burning or if my dogs crap in the house.

BUT...the things I CAN smell, I hate. Coffe, candles, and women with too much perfume.

Gack.

The Future said...

Interesting how each commentor has picked up on something different from your blog. I guess that means you ramble or wait a minute, make that you diversify, your blog. Something for everyone, right? Speaking of soap scum cleaner, I think the lighthouse could have used some.

C said...

I certainly relate to you on the whole hassle of posting. I started my blog as a journal that others could read and maybe engender a nice little community of similarly unhinged people, but I don't post enough to be popular with the unhinged. Who would've thought they'd be so discerning?

This bothers me at times, but I don't even write in my actual journal that much and my blog is supposed to be for me. I can only analyze myself so much. What? Do they want me to tear myself apart? The bastards!

Posts about other things are usually kinda forced and I can't really tell if they're crap or not because I don't really care about what I wrote. That's a bad feeling.

Gorilla Bananas said...

Take a dictaphone with you so you don't lose your thoughts. If you talk enough, you're bound to say something worth printing.

Amber said...

Of course I'm prepared. I have a hoodie. Which, sadly, is all that I need in Florida.

Cool pictures.

Kara said...

mary - it's a good lighthouse. i'm proud of it, even though i had no hand in its creation whatsoever. and i don't know about tiles, really...i have a claw foot tub.

macoosh - and you always will. sigh.

sarah - you know what's funny? i thought you'd like that.

rachel - did i know you got a new job? do you like it? does it eat away at your soul like mine does?

kevbo - what??? you hate the smell of coffee? you would NOT be welcome in the NW, my friend. but i'm with you on the other shit...so you'd be welcome by me at least. but that's IT.

future - oh i RAMBLE do i? hmmmm...where could i have gotten that little genetic trait from?

c - you need to find a happy medium. i'm not sure what that would be...but you could write about trying to find it.

goranas - 'dictophone'? what are you, old? actually, i've thought about getting something like that, but i thought it would look suspicious if i pulled it out during meetings.

amber - well, you also need a hurricane cardigan. you should get on that.

Orhan Kahn said...

Since when was bathroom cleaner useful?

The Anonymous said...

Hi! My name is Project 71. Weird name I know, but my masters are weird too. My masters also say that I'm a really interesting website. So why don't you consider reading what I am. Masters say it won't take you more than 22s to read. :) http://www.project71.com/readme Enjoyy!

Jackie said...

So, are you choking yourself with the amount of perfume or do you just happen to be wearing a lot of perfume and choking yourself at the same time?

If it's the latter, I applaud you for wanting to smell nice when you're found.

Jill said...

I knida like foggy, dreary weather, as long as it's not too cold. I guess it comes from living too long in the bowels of Hades (central Texas).

Anonymous said...

Listen hippie, perfume is not a substitute for bathing. That advice goes for body oils also. When you choke to death on your own smell we'll make sure to bath your dead corpse before there is a viewing and lightly dab perfume on your pulse points.

Good day stinky

Kara said...

the anonymous - spammer!

jackie - choking with the amount. i'm so not into that auto erotic asphyxiations nonsense, i don't care what INXS thinks is cool.

jill - ugh...texas.

amy - how could you FIND my pulse points if i'm DEAD?!

froelica said...

HAHA!! Wow. I actually came onto the comments intending to write "Erected. Hehehe..." but Sarah beat me to it! Great minds think alike I guess. Is "great" the right word?

Um Naief said...

you're funny, but you prob already know that!

i got your blog from my sis' blog (jahooni).

love the pics, especially the last one.

here in this part of the world, it doesn't rain much. the rains will come by the end of this month and then go until prob feb and that's it. i miss them and wish we had the rain you guys get there. i miss the sound of thunderstorms and downpours... so, you could actually call yourself lucky! ;)