Thursday, November 02, 2006

The Cure for a Snake Bite

This is in Marrakech. The dude would play his horn and the snakes would all flail about. I never got closer than this. I saw children go much closer and I thought "idiots".

But later I was told that I was the idiot. It was perfectly safe to go up to the snakes. You could even taunt them if you wanted to...wanna know why??? They're mouths were sewn shut. If you could look closer, you'd see black thread criss-crossing along their poor little venomnous mouths.

Snake slavery at its worst.

Yesterday I was riding my bike home and then something funny happened that I was definitely going to blog about. But I forgot it, like, 10 minutes
later. I'm aging, friends.

Halloween was the shit. The good kind. Not Halloween, exactly, but the Saturday before it. Maybe I'll post a picture, maybe I won't...'cause my costume is kinda nekkidy. I was a dead ballerina. The Crew, Law Student and I party hopped, and that was pretty ok, except that I was designated driver so, you know, sober.

Election time is coming. I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to vote because my ballot had gone to my now demolished previous residence on Stark st. But I got it all sorted out and I will single-handedly bring down the inbred twat that is State Gubernatorial candidate...Ron Saxton. Fear me, Ron...fear me.




Blowhard

17 keep(s) me blogging:

Jen said...

How do the snakes eat? Seems counterproductive; those dudes would have to snake hunt like every month or two once their sewn sibilant pals dies of starvation. What about drinking? I bet snakes get thirsty. Stupid head moroccans. Let's send Ron Saxton to Morroco and they can sew his mouth shut. My mother thinks his mouth looks like a butthole. No lie.

Anonymous said...

Was the music as cool as it is in the movies?

And, go ahead. Post the dead ballerina pic. We won't look. Promise!

INAMINI said...

I wanna see the dead ballerina!

Anonymous said...

agreed, i bet the dead ballerina costume was great!!!

Anonymous said...

First of all, you were a Zombie Ballerina, not totally dead. Secondly, I hope you have more clout than I think you do to truly torpedo Meester Saxtone, he deserves that and more. Yet another opportunity to vote for the lesser of two (dwe)evils. - The Futureakehksvv

sarah said...

I am just voting for the candidate who sends me the least crap mail and phone calls in the next election. I think I hate Everett Curry the most this year. 5 pieces of mail, all different, in the mail today. All from him. Pig. Oh, and Ron Saxton's mouth does look like a butthole. Good call.

Niall said...

My sentements exactly, Jen. How do they eat? I was watching some program before where they were talking about snake charmers (that's what they're called, right?), and apparently the men playing the horn is just for visual effect, and doesn't make any difference. I don't know whether or not this is true ... but ... but sewing their mouths together ...

My Halloween wasn't Halloween-esque. I was in London for interviews, staying in the Hilton but couldn't go out because I had to get up really early for those interviews ... Meh. I'll get over it.

apterix55 said...

Snake charmers and Ron Saxton in the same blog entry. The metaphor is not lost on me.

d said...

i wanna hear about the funny thing that happened on your bike ride home. i think you should put all of your effort over the next few days into remembering that.

but i know you don't care what i think.

why do they call them gubernatorial candidates? you don't call them gubernors when they're elected. come on america... get with the program.

i'm just kidding. please, tell your scary leader not to attack us. it was just a joke. and, we don't have any weapons of mass destruction. come to think of it, we barely have any weapons at all. we used to have a submarine, but i think it caught on fire. we bought it used from the british. buyer beware as they say.

but i'm getting off track. where's that story about the bike ride home?

Kara said...

jen - ha ha...you said butthole

kevin - the music was pretty damn cool when I heard it...mostly i just heard prayers being sung over loudspeaker. i'm still thinking about the halloween pic...it's not flattering.

inamini/macoosh - patience young ones

the future - i was too dead!

sarah - ha ha...you said butthole too.

niall - londoners don't trick or treat do they...sad. yeah, the snakes weren't really on beat or anything

apterix - you know i'm all sorts of deep, dad

d - i still can't remember it...but i have another funny thing i'm gonna post about today. oh yeah, that reminds me...YOU NEED TO POST MORE. Seriously, you get a girlfriend and all your writing goes to pot. You don't see me slackin' off with Law Student around.

Anonymous said...

kara...your request for eyebrow shots has been granted.

-macoosh:)

d said...

so is it just the frequency that's gone to pot or the content too? i stopped posting because i thought the content was starting to suck. it's not offensive enough, you know?

Mycaelus said...

So the cure for a snake bite is to sew a snake's mouth shut? I thought that had more to do with prevention of future snake bites than cure of ones you already have...

Or maybe the cure is to vote?

Kara said...

d - frequency is the only issue

mycaelus - i warn you against trying to read too much into what i write.

niall said...

Well I saw some kids who were dressed up in dead ballerina and skeleton costumes etc and they were going from house to house with demanding sweets ... I guess they do then. They were supervised though. Doesn't everyone trick or treat? Didn't see any snakes there, but I saw a couple of foxes oddly enough.

Orhan Kahn said...

I wish we could sow shut the mouths of our politicians. Would make voting easier.

slaghammer said...

They should use duct tape instead of sewing their mouths shut. The snakes I mean, not the politicians. For the politicians, stapling is the only way to go.