This is why I love Marie. Last night, 2/3 of the Crew and I go for lemon drop happy hour (sorry, Laura, you have to be able to leave your baby/leach for more than an hour). We split around 8 because I have to go check out an apartment and when I leave said apartment a couple hours later, there's a message on my phone.
Here's an abbreviated transcript:
Marie (very distressed): Kara, this is Marie. I need you to call me back because I just got these new salt and pepper shakers and I can't figure out which one is for salt and which is for pepper and I'm trying to fill them. Anyway, I need your help.
I begin chortling immediately. 'Silly girl', I thought, everyone knows how to tell which is which.
Yeah, wrong.
So I call her back:
Me (patronizingly): You have a few too many lemon drops, Marie?
Marie: I kept going when I got home.
Me: Ahhhh...that's ok then. So here's how you tell...the one with more holes is for salt, 'cause you want more salt than you do pepper, in general.
Marie: Yeah but the other one has bigger holes.
Me (disbelieving): The one with less holes has bigger holes?
Marie (exasperated): Yes!
Me (flabbergasted): Oh.
Marie: Yeah.
Me: Well shit. I think that one's still for pepper, because, you know, pepper bits are sometimes bigger than salt.
Marie: Yeah, ok, that makes sense.
Me: Oh yeah, I'm moving out of my ghetto apartment in two weeks.
Marie: Yay!
The last part, though mentioned, has nothing to do with the amusingness of this conversation, but I included it because it's true and I'm excited about it. I'm going to have a new roommate and a home with heat...a front door that closes and probably locks...and NO BLACK MOLD!
Happy Friday, people!
9 keep(s) me blogging:
I am terribly upset. I did not get the salt and pepper call, and I knew the rules to the salt and pepper game. I'm getting Marie some Mrs. Dash and that'll solve the whole damn problem.
Mrs Dash is a problem in and of herself, (she drinks heavily you know). Keep me informed on the pepper issue, as I too, may, one day, purchase actual shakers rather than simply using the jar from the store.
Congrats on your new digs, post a journal on your adventures in moving, (you may also be getting new shakers...)
I have to say the absence of mold is somewhat more exciting than the size of the holes in the pepper shaker and I could certainly see how that would be the high point of your day????? You need to get a life! Once you have a normal abode, you'll have no excuse for this silliness. You'll have to resort to some other silliness. I'm confident you'll manage.
i find it hilarious that you were flabbergasted at the realization that the one with less holes had bigger holes.
did you flop down on the floor with your hands to your head in disbelief and astonishment? 'cause that's how i'd react.
I was amusing myself with the thought that the pictures on this blog were the pictures of the salt and pepper holders. I guess they weren't ... were they?
Have you mentioned your moving to your vampire neighbor yet? I once saw a movie about vampires where a family of them would act as though they were vampires (though they could come out at night, but didn't to scare people away). The end of it involves nobody talking to them ever, them getting very lonely and killing everyone in the neighborhood.
lol..i LOVE the salt and pepper game!
and yay for a new apt!!! one thing i can't wait for when i get back to the states is having my own apt. it's weird being back in dorm life...
yay, have fun but make sure to say goodbye to the black mold...it needs closure just like the rest of us.
-macoosh:)
jen - well after what i witnessed this weekend, it's good you didn't get the call...your salt and pepper is BACKWARDS!
recluse - i have no idea what Mrs. Dash is.
the future - i am the embodiment of silliness
d - no...and i can TELL you're mocking me. harumph.
niall - no, but there's a funny story there.
macoosh - well it's not just my own...i'll have a roomie. i hope he doesn't hate me...but he might hate my cat...which is ok.
I recommend drilling, ice picking, or ramming a fork into the holes of the pepper shaker. Better yet, screw off the cap and flatten it with a hammer, throw it away and leave the pepper in the store container, less misery that way.
Mrs. Dash is an herbal sort of salt/pepper combo thingy.
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